5 Reasons Why I HATE Public Bathrooms

1.) They smell like rotten butt flesh.

2.) They always seems to be abnormally humid.

3.) You stick to every surface making it a horrid task to open stall doors and bathroom doors.

4.) Everyone is uncomfortably silent and seems to be on edge.

5.) 50% of the time there is someone taking a poop in the stall next to you with no shame (aka loudly).

They are so dirty. I feel like I am diseased after them. HOWEVER, I have decided that it is best to get all the sicknesses and infections now, so that I build up a strong immunity when I am old and weak...... if I survive that long. So, in an effort to protect myself later, I enter these bacterial breeding grounds.

Things I Love

Back in Action

Dear world,

It has been months since I last blogged soooo it is about time that the world was filled in (aka all 1 of you):

1.) Moved locations to South Melbourne

2.) Caught a Seagull

3.) Felt the heat of 112 F in a city

Moved in down the city, obsessed. Minus the homeless man that I have to walk by at my tram stop to get home..... He lives in a small shelter like house near the stop. I walk past and when he is awake, and not scratching his skin nearly off, he seems as though he might murder me with his stink eye. The apartment is amazing though.

So it was so hot the other day I nearly melted. That is about all you need to know about that. Ps. don't buy the spray deodorant..... it does not work in extreme conditions which I, and the rest of the tram, found out when I lifted my arm.

In terms of the seagull I am 99% sure that I need to get tested for diseases. Me, thinking it looked soft (I may have had a couple of drinks... for you to decide) found one and managed to catch it....... I could barely stand and put one foot in front of the other yet I managed to catch a seagull..... I know. So I pet it until it bit me really hard. I woke up in the morning and there was a small cut on my hand..... most likely teaming with bacteria and viruses ready for a kill. Same night, I decided hide and seek was a great game to play with my much more coherent friend Rachel (she wasn't playing)..... I hid....... she found me crouching in an alley doorway...... smelled like piss and vomit....... most likely was riddled with disease. I honestly need to go and get checked by the doctor.

Ps. Seagulls are soft..... like really soft.

Looks more fun when your drunk. Huh?